Heartache.

I'm hoping this blogging this will help take my mind off of how stressed out I am, I'm just going to write what comes to mind.
This morning I received word that my grandmother was only expected to live a few more days.  I cannot tell you my heartache. When Andrew and I were in the states, I wanted to go visit my grandmother, but we just didn't have the time. I should have MADE time. I feel so guilty, I may not get the chance to say goodbye to her. I'm hoping her Italian stubbornness will shine through and she'll hold on just long enough for me to say goodbye. She always got what she wanted, so I'm hoping she really wants to say goodbye to me.
Trying to buy tickets home is a nightmare. I don't want to get there too late, as to inconvenience anyone who may had to pick me up. I don't know whether to buy one ticket or two because Andrew doesn't know if he'll be able to get emergency leave or not. It's honestly one of the most frustrating situations I've ever dealt with. I feel like the White Rabbit in Alice and Wonderland. I'm running around frantically like a chicken with it's head cut off screaming "I'm late! I'm late! For a very important date!' I'm surely glad I did the laundry a few days ago.
I hope and pray that God will allow me to say goodbye to her, and I hope Andrew can get emergency leave to come with me. I really need my husband.

Good Heavens, It's 2011!

Hello Loved Ones,

  I'm sorry it took so long to make a New Years blog.  New Years Eve was pretty low key for us, but fun, nonetheless. We had a few friends over for a barbecue and watched the London version of The Dick Clark New Years Eve Special, or whatever it's called. I found it sort of amusing that when they started doing the fireworks, which went on FOREVER, they played We Will Rock You, by Queen.

 After all of that, I kicked off 2011 with one of the greatest things in the world, Florida State Football! Of course, Florida State won, which I think is a great sign that 2011 will be great!

It's only 6 days into 2011, and already it looks pretty promising! As I told you all in a previous blog, I've started the search for my biological mother. Well, I got an e-mail from the adoption agency I was adopted through, and they said they've started "investigating my case." I thought the wording sounded pretty cool, pretty 007. I'm excited, nervous, and pretty darn anxious. Whenever I tell people about it, the question always comes up "How do your parents feel about that... I mean your adoptive parents."

First of all, I've always thought that it was odd to say my "adoptive parents." They're my parents. The only set I've got, the only set I'll ever have.  They changed my diapers, rocked me to sleep, dealt with my millions of ear infections, dealt with my difficult teenage ways, they were there for my wedding, the list goes on and on! Even though my biological mother gave me life in the technical aspect, my parents gave me life in the true sense of the meaning. They taught me how to live life with no fears, how to be confident, how to believe in myself, how to have Faith, and taught me to be a daughter of God, etc. Yes, I may be meeting my bioligical mother in the near future, but John Francis & MarySue Occhiuzzo will always be my parents.

Also, I've become the admin/moderator, whatever you'd like to call it, for two different pages online that are kind of like support groups for military wives. One is specifically for Air Force wifes, the other is for anyone affiliated with all branches, but it's mostly wives, mothers, and sisters. I've loved every minute of it so far. It makes me feel so awesome every time one of them comes looking for advice or an unbiased opinion. I love being able to help! These sites are so much fun. I feel a connection to every single one of them, it's almost as if they're a part of me already. Andrew has suggested that I go back to school and become a counselor. I guess he sees how happy it makes me. We'll see.

2011 is also our last full year stationed in England. I'm so excited to see where we'll end up next. I'm a a bit stressed out at the moment though. Command sponsorship is taking FOREVER, and I'm scared that I'll just sit on someone's desk and we'll have to PCS in April to Mountain Home. Well, such is the life of a military wife. Speaking of which, I live with my husband, but it seems like I never see him! Last night he got home at 5am! It can't be safe for them to work 12 hours then drive home when there's no one on the road. I guess I shouldn't be complaining, it wasn't that long ago that I went months with out seeing him and was constantly worried about his safety. Before that, I'd gone 8 month with out seeing him. I should be perfectly content just being able to sleep in his arms. I also should mention we've put in for leave April 22-29th. Cross your fingers that we get to be stateside for a week!!

I wish you all happiness, health, and blessings in the new year! I love you all bunches.

All our love,

The Pearsons